I was viewing my cpanel to see if I have enough space to squeeze in one more hostee. So while I was browsing through my cpanel I decided to check my web statistics (which doesn’t happen often, by the way) and came across this – My top keyphrases from search engines for July:
- how to make an affy
- watch fireworks online
- plastic thong
- paris tities
- a mass of gauges & dials & registers but we can only read a few
- naked pictures serbia
- masturbations home page
- wtf? layouts
- cows getting fucked
- layouts wtf
- napoleon dynamite layouts for xanga
- virtual fuck machines
- watch fireworks for free
- badminton video
- my birthday spanking
- paris hilton need to pee
- radio blog all american rejects
- therejects
- he sucks tities
- ghb naked pics
- vagina pics
- ghb video
I don’t know what the fuck is an affy but I have the secret recipe for an affy. I don’t know why but I just do. So here’s the step by step recipe:
- Mix three parts red bull to one part cigarretes
- Next, throw in anything porno related
- Then, a pinch of the coolest blog on the web. By the coolest blog on the web, I mean, this blog
- Mix all these in a toilet bowl
- A dash of broken hearts
- Leave overnight with loud music playing in the background
- Curse at the mixture every 3 hours for better end result. I heard that the phrase “Fuck you! you piece of shit.” works best!
- The next morning, put a little bit of salt and mineral water
- Then, throw in a digital camera
- andd… drum roll please… Congratulations! You made your first affy. Pat yourself at the back and go have a red bull
Moving on, are all my readers perverts? Hahha. Just look at the search phrases. Who in the world wants to see a cow getting fucked or even worse, paris hilton peeing? I don’t know what a birthday spanking is but it sounds really cool and kinky. Hahaa
I think who ever typed in naked, tities, vagina, thong, ghb, therejects or masturbation deserves a cookie or even better, internet pervert of the year award. Rumor has it that winning internet pervert of the year award includes a lifetime subscription of Playboy magazine and unlimited refill of baby lotion. Now, who doesn’t want that?
Sorry folks, no photos today. I’m too lazy to edit and resize them.
Until next time, this is Affy asking for donations. Keep TR.ORG alive!
{ 5 comments… read them below or add one }
If only i had taken your advise and burnt that boat down..ah it would have been beautiful. LMAO, your site does seem to attract pervs and weirdos – poor you! (although your probably secretly proud of yourself).
I might make an affy later on but with such a complex recipe – I’ll probably create my very own lil Frankenstein.
eh…I’m not a perv.. *laughing people in the background*
ahaha, I was going to try and make an affy, but then when it came to the digital camera part…I didn’t want my baby dying.
Can I get my cookie…like now> I’m hungry and I think I already ate my mouse.
Heyyy Affy! I bet your the one searching all that weird shit. Admit it, you have a problem! Hahahah.
I’d make an affy but, eff the digi cam part. What would happen if I just left that part out? What would you be missing??
LOL, I found loads of porn and stuff when I browsed through my stats – someone also searched for how to masturbate
WAIT
did you give my friend Mitchell space on your site???
o.0 he showed me his blog and crap.